Private Landlord Articles | Helping Landlords

Best Ways For Landlords To Cut Costs & Save Money

Best Ways For Landlords To Cut Costs & Save Money

14 Jul 2014 / Landlord Finances, Taxes & Saving Costs / 9 Comments

Becoming a landlord isn’t particularly difficult. Any idiot with a semi-functioning brain and a bit of capital can jump onto this bandwagon- and they generally do. I stand before you as living proof. Not proud, just saying. However, being a “good” landlord isn’t so straight forward. There’s an unenjoyable learning curve to climb and many […]

My Landlord Evicted Me Because I Asked For Repairs, Is That Legal?

My Landlord Evicted Me Because I Asked For Repairs, Is That Legal?

23 Jun 2014 / Tenant Advice / 26 Comments

For those that came here for the quick answer and can’t stomach enduring my meandering dribble, it’s “NO”, now get out of ‘ere. But for those that do… I’ve been emailed the question a couple of times in the last month or so, by tenants that claim their landlords are evicting them because they complained […]

How To Find DSS/DWP Tenants

How To Find DSS/DWP Tenants

11 Jun 2014 / DWP / DSS Tenants / 22 Comments

It takes a lot to throw this morbid and delusional mind off course, but on the rare occasion it happens, it’s a beautiful thing. Last week, I received an email from a new landlord that posed a question that left me slightly mystified and strangely curious. I had to perform a double-take just to ensure […]

My Tenant’s Rent Is Late, What Should I Do?

My Tenant’s Rent Is Late, What Should I Do?

28 May 2014 / Managing Your Rental Property / 22 Comments

If you ever happen to capture the grey mood of a hunched over landlord; strolling around aimlessly and depleted of life, like his world has fallen apart- the law of averages says he’s dealing with a tenant in arrears. Because, sadly, we don’t really care or get saddened by much else, and the only other […]

Landlord Licensing Scheme- What, Where, When?

Landlord Licensing Scheme- What, Where, When?

12 May 2014 / Landlord Legal Issues / 26 Comments

There was a time when ONLY landlords of House of Multiple Occupation (HMOs) required a license to let their property, while the rest of us were spared. But that was back when we were living blissfully in ignorance. Alas, since then some very rich and powerful people sat down with some super smart statistical analysts […]

It’s The Estate Agents Job To Sell You An Impractical Piece Of Crap

It’s The Estate Agents Job To Sell You An Impractical Piece Of Crap

05 May 2014 / Buying Property Tips / 10 Comments

A couple of weeks ago I almost elevated my landlord status to the next level and became an even bigger ‘landlord wanker’ by scooping up my first commercial property. The Lord knows there’s nothing worse than an arsehole landlord with ambition in the middle of an economic meltdown. There’s people out there increasingly feeling the […]

Ultimate Guide For New Landlords

Ultimate Guide For New Landlords

22 Apr 2014 / Property Investment Tips & Info / 19 Comments

If you’re an experienced landlord you’ll probably want to skip this post altogether. Close the door behind you, leave me alone with the frightened, young and naive, I’ve got this under control. I remember when I was starting the process of looking into buying my first buy-to-let property and becoming a landlord. Not just any […]

Here’s How NOT To Tell Your Tenants To Be Cleaner

Here’s How NOT To Tell Your Tenants To Be Cleaner

08 Apr 2014 / Managing Your Rental Property / 15 Comments

A couple of weeks ago I received an email from a chap that kindly forwarded me an email that his friend received from her disgruntled (and most likely psychotic) live-in landlord. I was meaning to throw it up on my blog sooner, but procrastination is a bitch, and as glamorous as strapping myself down to […]

Do You REALLY Need To Increase Your Tenant’s Rent?

Do You REALLY Need To Increase Your Tenant’s Rent?

13 Mar 2014 / Landlord Finances, Taxes & Saving Costs / 29 Comments

Besides from swimming in pools of money and knocking-back shots of Hennessy out of strippers navels, there are a few other key tasks every landlord should be doing on a regular basis, which includes: Making routine Landlord inspections to ensure the tenants aren’t filthy bastards, and are able to refrain from exploding their arses all […]

You Should Hear What My Landlord Says…

You Should Hear What My Landlord Says…

24 Feb 2014 / Tenant Advice / 12 Comments

Earlier today I was having what can only be described as a tragically mundane conversation with a female buddy of mine via Whatsapp; nothing inappropriate was being said, nor did she have the decency to transfer any of her home-made erotica. It was almost pointless and a total waste of my precious time. But then, […]

Tenants And The Loose Tap Syndrome

Tenants And The Loose Tap Syndrome

10 Feb 2014 / Tenant Advice / 28 Comments

Sigh. “The loose tap syndrome” is the name I’ve given to the repugnant illness commonly contracted by tenants; primary symptom being the uncontrollable necessity of reporting every bullshit minuscule maintenance issue that a mentally impaired chimp is capable of resolving, let alone a fully grown human idiot. However, instead of being useful and fixing the […]

Should New Landlords Use A Letting Agent?

Should New Landlords Use A Letting Agent?

15 Jan 2014 / Managing Your Rental Property / 30 Comments

Bit late, but happy New Year everyone! I hope you all got shit-faced and participated in at least one stupid activity that you’ll regret for the rest of your life. I know I did, and that’s why I’m probably dripping with gonorrhea right now. All over my keyboard and shit. Anyways… A few days ago […]

Q&A With The Landlord, ‘i need to find a land load that aceps dss’

Q&A With The Landlord, ‘i need to find a land load that aceps dss’

17 Dec 2013 / Ranting Landlord / 14 Comments

Three of the biggest drags about running this landlord blog: 1) I’m still doing it without being an award winning blogger (how I’ve managed to continue without recognition is beyond me) 2) Contrary to popular belief, blogging still ain’t getting me laid 3) Getting buried with high volumes of ridiculous emails But let’s focus on […]

The Worst Kind Of Landlord

The Worst Kind Of Landlord

21 Nov 2013 / Ranting Landlord / 10 Comments

Whether it be due to ignorance or intention, most landlords are generally arseholes (not you or I though), first class honour dip-shits. They drag their heals when repairs are required, they’re oblivious to their legal responsibilities and obligations as a landlord, and even though they’re drowning in mortgage debt and/or negative equity, they still have […]

Decorating/Renovation Tips For Buy-To-Let Properties & Landlords

Decorating/Renovation Tips For Buy-To-Let Properties & Landlords

25 Oct 2013 / Managing Your Rental Property / 13 Comments

Tenants don’t give a shit about your property. Learn it, live it, love it. If you remember that pillar of wisdom, especially when decorating/renovating, and allow it to influence your landlording decisions, you’re going to be OK. Alternatively, you’ll be blowing your cash hard and fast, and the stress will transform you into a walking, […]

Saving Is Pointless Right Now, So I’m Reducing My Mortgage

Saving Is Pointless Right Now, So I’m Reducing My Mortgage

16 Sep 2013 / Landlords Tips / 14 Comments

Usually around this time of year, as the summer begins to wind down and I’m putting my Speedos away in storage, I start receiving letters from various banks informing me that it’s time for me to bend over and get shafted by their biggest and their best. It’s their loving way of telling me I’m […]

‘Finding A Tenant’ Guide For Landlords- How To Find Tenants

‘Finding A Tenant’ Guide For Landlords- How To Find Tenants

09 Sep 2013 / Marketing & Finding Tenants / 2 Comments

Are you struggling to find a tenant or simply looking for the most efficient methods of finding a tenant? Then this might be the article for you. When the process of finding tenants is taking longer than anticipated it can be frustrating, and it’s a common problem many landlords face! I’ve been there; it’s a […]

The Lessons You Never Forget As A Landlord / Person

The Lessons You Never Forget As A Landlord / Person

12 Aug 2013 / Ranting Landlord / 38 Comments

It’s been a while, just over a month; I don’t think I’ve ever gone so long without blogging, and to be honest, I’m forcing these words out of myself right now just to end the drought. I’m not entirely sure how this post will pan out, but for the most part I know it’s going […]

I Don’t Care How You Do It, Just Get Your Vacant Property On Rightmove

I Don’t Care How You Do It, Just Get Your Vacant Property On Rightmove

11 Jul 2013 / Marketing & Finding Tenants / 14 Comments

A few days ago I had some letting agent shister shamelessly promote his own company under a fake alias on my blog by masquerading as a satisfied customer. That kind of embarrassing marketing tactic isn’t unheard of. In fact, it’s quite common, especially among estate/letting agents, so he shouldn’t feel alone, only suicidal. He left […]

If I Could Offer Only One Landlord Tip

If I Could Offer Only One Landlord Tip

29 May 2013 / Managing Your Rental Property / 15 Comments

Last week I was liaising with someone that is in the midst of the beautiful process of purchasing their first Buy-To-Let property. Whilst discussing his acquisition, I was asked, what would be my ONE golden tip for a new landlord. Good question, although kinda’ impractical. While I don’t believe there to be a silver bullet […]

No More Council Tax Exemption For Landlords, Probably

No More Council Tax Exemption For Landlords, Probably

17 May 2013 / Landlords Tips / 74 Comments

It’s always a tragic day when the Government conjure up a new and exciting way of squeezing extra pennies out of us pawns to help drag them out of the barrel of shit they got themselves into. But they can always rely on us landlords, we’re more than happy to help, right? While I try […]

The Ten Commandments For Tenants

The Ten Commandments For Tenants

04 May 2013 / Tenant Advice / 7 Comments

I received a tenant’s rent today, but it was delivered an excruciating 12 days late, but it was no big deal. It’s the first time it’s been delayed by this particular tenant, and he’s generally a very reasonable chap. However, he did “that thing”!! The thing which I’ve already discussed in detail and already blown […]

Sign Up To The Landlord Newsletter: Real Experiences, Tips, Advice & Discount Codes

Sign Up To The Landlord Newsletter: Real Experiences, Tips, Advice & Discount Codes

14 Apr 2013 / Ranting Landlord / 0 Comments

After much hesitation and deliberation I’ve finally got around to setting up a platform to create and deliver newsletters. I literally just spent my entire Saturday setting this shit up, and I’m hoping it will result in something particularly useful for everyone. Sacrificing a Saturday to code and design isn’t particularly fulfilling, but… actually, there […]

Landlord Insurance

09 Apr 2013 / Managing Your Rental Property / 1 Comment

Looking for quick and easy Landlord Insurance quotes for your Buy-to-let property? Then you’ve come to the right place. Get quick and easy Landlord Insurance quotes There is no obligation and receiving the quotes is 100% free. As a Landlord it is essential that you have the right insurance. If you click on the banner […]

Early Signs Of Potentially Awful Tenants

Early Signs Of Potentially Awful Tenants

08 Apr 2013 / Managing Your Rental Property / 21 Comments

I don’t know if old age has made me stupid crazy, or whether it’s just the toll of having dealt with total dip-shit tenants, but I seem to get increasingly rigorous and perceptive with every viewing I take with prospective tenants. As I’ve said many times in the past, the thought of having to deal […]

My Letting Agent Wanted to Screw My Tenant and Ended Up Screwing Me Over Instead

My Letting Agent Wanted to Screw My Tenant and Ended Up Screwing Me Over Instead

26 Mar 2013 / Problems With Estate/Letting Agents / 7 Comments

A friend of mine recently told me about one of her letting woes as a landlord; her misery had me so amused that I convinced her to quickly jot her story down so I could share it with ya’ll. My initial plan was to regurgitate the corpse of her notes, and develop it into an […]

12 Of The Biggest Mistakes Landlords Make

12 Of The Biggest Mistakes Landlords Make

13 Mar 2013 / Managing Your Rental Property / 8 Comments

I’m surprised I haven’t compiled this list already. Strange, because it seems like such an obvious choice. I’m usually the first to point out misfortunes. One of the luxuries of having a website dedicated to an interest of mine, where people continually ask for advice and complain about shit, is that it allows me to […]

Where Did My Landlord Secure My Tenancy Deposit?

Where Did My Landlord Secure My Tenancy Deposit?

01 Mar 2013 / Tenant Advice / 3 Comments

If from your recollection or the abundance of paperwork you received at the beginning of your tenancy, you can’t determine whether or not your deposit was secured into a tenancy deposit scheme, it’s ALWAYS worth asking your landlord or letting agent the question, especially if they’re, rightly or wrongly so, trying to deduct some of […]

Do Landlords Need A New Gas Safety Certificate Between Tenants?

Do Landlords Need A New Gas Safety Certificate Between Tenants?

20 Feb 2013 / Landlord Legal Issues / 11 Comments

There was some confusion on my blog earlier today, over in the Gas Safety Certificate blog post. A Mrs Tara Plumbing left a comment saying that the information on the web page was incorrect- you can only imagine how my plump ego took that. The piece of information in question was where I said a […]

What To Do After Your Tenant’s Deposit Is Secured

What To Do After Your Tenant’s Deposit Is Secured

04 Feb 2013 / Landlord Legal Issues / 8 Comments

Securing a tenant’s deposit is a pretty run of the mill process for landlords these days. Nothing new there; seems pretty straight forward; you secure your tenant’s deposit online, perhaps simultaneously watch a little bit of porn to fill in the page-loading blanks, job done. Sadly, the golden days are only but a distant memory. […]

My Incompetent Tenants Painted Over Mould- Guide to Treating Mould

My Incompetent Tenants Painted Over Mould- Guide to Treating Mould

18 Jan 2013 / Property Development / 55 Comments

Seems like many blue Moons ago now, but it was only a month or so ago I was shaking my fists in the air while projectile vomiting over my overalls, after having witnessed the horrific conditions my donkey tenants (now ex) chose to live their existence in. During my hissyfit, I briefly discussed how the […]

Too Many DSS Tenants On The Same Street Can Reduce The Value Of Your Property

Too Many DSS Tenants On The Same Street Can Reduce The Value Of Your Property

07 Jan 2013 / DWP / DSS Tenants / 19 Comments

How utterly thoughtless of me, I haven’t thrown together a DSS/DWP tenant related blog post in a while. I know how well they go down around ‘ere, like a smooth shot of Bourbon cum. *mutters* I’ve probably been slack because I’ve been preoccupied with trying to evict employed private tenants that fell into arrears and […]

I’ve Been Scarred, So I’m Jacking Up The Tenancy Deposit

I’ve Been Scarred, So I’m Jacking Up The Tenancy Deposit

30 Dec 2012 / Landlord Finances, Taxes & Saving Costs / 18 Comments

Seasons greetings all! Hope everyone had an awesome Christmas! I’m generally not a Christmas person, but mine was pretty good (better than recent years). I’m at that awkward in-between age; too old to get into a Christmas frenzy, and too youthful, sexy and beautiful to have my own children (no one say a word). To […]

My Tenant Left Me With Unpaid Rent, Greasy Worktops & A Bathroom Covered In Mould

My Tenant Left Me With Unpaid Rent, Greasy Worktops & A Bathroom Covered In Mould

04 Dec 2012 / Evicting Tenants, Landlord Eviction Help & Advice / 25 Comments

So here it is, the final chapter of my saga. It’s been a brutal few months (for me), which I know some of you have thoroughly enjoyed watching unravel. Unfortunately for you, it’s over, so stick that in your pipe and smoke it :) After this blog post, I’m probably going to return to compiling […]

I’m Probably Going To Have To Evict My Tenants

I’m Probably Going To Have To Evict My Tenants

22 Nov 2012 / Evicting Tenants, Landlord Eviction Help & Advice / 14 Comments

Urgh. That pretty much sums up the nature of this blog post. My emotions are volatile right now, so I apologise in advance if I lapse into a paroxysmal fit and say inappropriate shit that no one should ever have to endure. More so than usual. I was contemplating scraping this blog post entirely in […]

How Long is ’2 Months In Arrears’, Really?

How Long is ’2 Months In Arrears’, Really?

12 Nov 2012 / Landlord Legal Issues / 5 Comments

This is going to be a quick, snappy post! ‘Less is more’ right now (but that’s clearly 100% untrue when I publish one of my long-arse bullshit posts!). How long is 2 months in arrears? Seems like a stupid question because the answer is in the question, right? Well, kinda’ I’ve realised there is some […]

How To Fill In A Section 21 Notice

How To Fill In A Section 21 Notice

03 Nov 2012 / Landlord Legal Issues / 34 Comments

For those that have been keeping up with my shenanigans, you’ll be aware that I was in the process of serving my tenants with a section 21 notice on the basis that they’re inconsiderate, lousy, no-good, late-paying fools! I’m done with them. I wash my hands of them. Crazy tenants. The thing about Section 21 […]

I’m Serving My Tenants Notice Because They’re Crazy. Hannibal Lecter Crazy

I’m Serving My Tenants Notice Because They’re Crazy. Hannibal Lecter Crazy

18 Oct 2012 / Evicting Tenants, Landlord Eviction Help & Advice / 17 Comments

Here’s a pathetic little fact for you: being a landlord has zero day-to-day perks. I literally cannot think of a single one! So we, as landlords, have to do what we can to make it bearable, even if only by a little, and so be it, if that entails serving notice for repossession to a […]

Late Rent Payment Fees

Late Rent Payment Fees

05 Oct 2012 / Landlord Legal Issues / 21 Comments

Like many of you (I’m sure), during my spare time I like to kick back, relax and bury my head in an assortment of Tenancy Agreements for some light reading. May I add, the ladies love it. It’s like walking around a park with a newborn. I haven’t read many tenancy agreements which enforce “late […]

Paying Rent In Advance To Entice The Landlord

Paying Rent In Advance To Entice The Landlord

26 Sep 2012 / Tenant Advice / 14 Comments

I’m sure you’ll all remember that I recently mashed together a blog post about how my friend and his girlfriend was struggling to find somewhere to rent, partially because of landlords and letting agents being unable to stick to their appointments. It was an emotional piece, which pulled on many heartstrings. The fabulous news is, […]