15 Reasons Why Estate Agents Are Idiots

Jesus, you're an idiot

It can’t just be a coincidence or a conspiracy, can it? There’s definitely a reason why so many of us fantasise about the demise of estate agents. If you haven’t had a soul-destroying experience with one, the odds are that you’re a stone’s throw away from someone that has.

I recently read the results of a national survey, which listed estate agents as one of the most hated people among society, sitting comfortably below ticket inspectors. I can’t clarify how reliable the source was, but it sounded about right. I guess would also explain why online estate agents like Puplebricks are quickly eating up the market share, because their model gives the selling power and control to the vendor, and eradicates the need of a traditional and local agent.

I could probably sit here all day and night compiling a list longer than my… for why we all hate estate agents. And I bet you could too. Besides from the fact the majority of them are snake-oil parasites providing below average services for extortionate rates, of course, I can also effortlessly conjure up other compelling reasons to throw my feces at them…

1] No qualifications required

There’s no real science or mystical theory to why the majority of Estate Agents are spineless, mentally challenged turds. In fact, it’s quite simple- you don’t need a license or go through a training programme to become an Estate Agent, so any old fool off the street without qualifications or experience can set up shop as an Estate Agent (which is often the case). That explains a lot already, doesn’t it?

In fact, I’m convinced the only prerequisite an Estate Agent is required to have is the means to access a polyester suit and a can of Lynx.

2] Limited consumer protection

Estate Agents are protected from their own stupidity, because it’s not a hugely regulated industry.

It’s extremely difficult to claim anything against Estate Agents, unless they do something blatantly illegal. It’s amazing how British consumers have more rights when buying a tin of baked beans when compared to spending tens of thousands of pounds on bricks and mortar.

3] The Wanker Mobile

Need I say more?

Estate Agent Car

4] “This property is extremely popular”

Needless to say, Estate agents aren’t short of a trick or two. One of their favourite being, arranging two viewings to “accidentally” coincide, so the property appears to be in demand. Alternatively, the agent may often get someone from the office to ring while taking a viewing and pretend that someone has just put an offer in.

Buyer beware, idiot with a semi-functioning brain in operation.

5] That house is perfect for you, sir!

Ever seen an estate agent discourage you from a buy simply because it’s not suitable? Me neither. They’ll lie through their teeth in order to encourage a sale, even if they’re trying to flog a pile of shit.


Hey Mr Estate Agent, is that barn an appropriate living environment for my wife and my newly born child?

Well, let me see; according to my calculations, I get 1.5% of the sale price. So if I worked this out correctly- then YES, it’s a perfect living environment for you and your family

Stupid Landlord Comic

6] The Estate Agents perfect deal

Estate Agents don’t try and get you the best deals; they try and get themselves the best deals. It’s all about the commission. Regardless of whether you’re a buyer or seller, they have tactical methods of trying to exploit anyone at either end of the chain.

If you’re a buyer, the Estate Agent may try and make you pay as much as possible for a property, so their commission is maximized. If you’re a seller, an Estate Agent may try to under value your property, and then quickly buy the property via a “friend” Sounds far-fetched, right? Happens all the damn time.

7] Different planet

They each live on a different planet, and naturally, they rule all.

Typical Estate Agent Comic

8] Time-wasters

Estate Agents love taking it upon themselves to show prospective buyers properties that are completely out of scope from their initial requirements. Why do they do that? It’s usually when they don’t have enough properties in their books that match the brief, so instead of fessing up and saying, “Sorry, we don’t have any properties that match your criteria”, they take their prospects on a bullshit wild goose chase.

Here’s an all-time classic clip from Gavin and Stacy of a stereotypical Estate Agent that’s a total time-waster. It’s funny because it’s true.

9] Money-grabbing buffoons

The nutritious problem with any competitive commission based job (but especially in this industry), is that the positions get filled with a particular type of idiot; greasy, ruthless and willing to kill for the next buck. They either come that way or eventually get conditioned by the system.

It’s truly a sad state of affairs.

I’d fancy my chances at finding a unicorn before finding an agent that looks after my best interest before their own transparent agenda.

money hungry estate agent

10] They hate their own kind

‘Black on Black’ crime was actually inspired by ‘Estate Agent on Estate Agent’ crime.

What chance do we as consumers have if they hate their own kind? I’m not just talking about feuds between rival companies; I’m also talking about in-house war. They backstab each other by taking each others leads. Other peoples’ misery is generally their gain.

11] Flyboarding

Do you often seen those hideous “for sale” and “for let” signs everywhere and think, “How can there be so many houses for sale/for let?”? The reality is, half of them aren’t available, and that’s what is known as “flyboarding”

Estate agents leave those hideous, out-dated signs up as a means of cheap advertising. “Cheap” being the operative word.

False advertising.

12] Turbulent Work Ethic

I tried selling during a booming market once. Ironically, it was a horrible experience.

I’ve realised that if the property market is ‘hot’ and there is plenty of demand, Estate Agents are generally performing at their worst. Their level of communication will be at an all-time low and they’ll be working by their own schedule. The reality is, during a property boom, houses sell themselves, so they really don’t have to do much ‘selling’ or provide much of a service.

However, if the market is dead, you may get the best out of them. They’ll probably pop round and drop off some sugar; build some common ground and try to ‘relate’ to you and your problems. It’s pitiful.

13] Mr Know-it-all

When an Estate Agent doesn’t know an answer to your question, don’t expect a confession, nor should you expect a respectable response like, “I’m not entirely sure, but I will find out for you and get back to you”

No sir, you should strap on your seatbelt and expect a train of verbal bullshit.


Hey, Mr Estate Agent, what are the local schools like around here?”

errr…well, they’re very good. Yeah, my daughter goes to the one around the corner. Highly recommended. Your children will be safe and well educated there”

The Estate Agent is lying. He doesn’t have a kid. He hasn’t even had sex with a human before, only with bags of money.

Estate Agent Lies

14] Ridiculous fees

Most of us have fallen victim to this nonsense; their piss poor service at bullshit prices. But it’s not just their prices that annoy many of us, it’s the way they create imaginative ways of swindling money out of us and then package it to us like they actually believe it’s a fair deal.

Some agents have the audacity to charge vendors even if they don’t sell their property after a certain period of time. While others force vendors to pay as much as 3% when they have merely found a “ready, willing and able buyer” Yes, it’s as ludicrous as it sounds- the fee is still applicable even if the sale doesn’t go through, as long as they find an interested party.

I’m sorry, WHAT? How about I bend over and stretch my arse cheeks wide apart for you, so you can lube me up with your pot of wetlook hair gel, and then get to work on me?

15] Chinese Whispers

You have to remember, the estate agent is the “middle-man” The problem with having a middle man, especially one that’s dressed in an oversized polyester Burtons suit, is that information often falls out of their head, meaning information doesn’t always seamlessly relay as it should. Strange that, innit?

It’s not uncommon for a lot of the lower-end offers to never get delivered to the vendor if the estate agents feels he can make more money from the deal.

Please note, I don’t actually think every Estate Agent out there is an unscrupulous tossor; I just think the majority have committed at least one of the sins above. I have no doubt in my mind that there are a few good men standing, they’re just not as easy to find as the remaining parasites.

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587 Comments- Join The Conversation...

Showing 537 - 587 comments (out of 587)
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Benji 18th August, 2015 @ 21:10


The vendor has saved nothing until they complete the sale. They may even have lost money by wasting time.

When you get to 50 completions, people might start to take you seriously.

But my issue was not about your core business, I am not an estate agent and welcome any competition in the sector.

Charging £65 for a £40 product does nothing to engender confidence in your enterprise.

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Stacey 21st August, 2015 @ 10:44

Hi Benji,

Of course we want to try and offer our clients the best rate on all our products. We cannot find any provider which genuinely offers them for £40.

We will certainly let you know when we have 50 completions.

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Owen 26th August, 2015 @ 14:58

All very interesting!
So no other industry charges more than they pay for a product/service...???

It's a basic free market design no?
And as for @simon merlin
They majority of time spent progressing a sale is spent chasing solicitors... Because you all take on average 3 months to progress a sale..... Is this to justify the 1000-1500 fee you charge for a bit of conveyancing???
I bought my first house recently.... Did my own..... Took 3 weeks.....

But as you say we're all incompetent morons who can't write our own name........

If we actually delve into it the person that owns the estate agent.... Absolutely be angry with them as that's who gets the majority of the fee!
I'm a branch manager at an estate agents in Oxford (great market place, lots of competitions)
Even if I'm still in the office at 7.30 speaking to clients, 6.30 in the morning to update an international client or driving countless miles around town to assist my clients move! I make 5% of the fee.
Average fee in Oxford is around £3500 meaning before tax I make 175 quid for a sale.
That's around 4 months work (as soliciters take so long to do their job) meaning for an average house sale and months of helping... I make less than £1.50 per day for each sale...

But I'm a money grabbing little so and so because I don't have a law degree??
I have a degree in business management..... Therefore I manage a business?

Nobody seems to complain when a perfume company charges hundreds of pounds a bottle when it costs pennies to make...
If we're all so awful why do people use us?
I've worked in this industry for around 8 years now involving 60 hour weeks late nights in the office and most estate agents basic salaries are around 12-14k per year....
I expect yours is fairly close to that eh @simonmerlin???

Don't blame the estate agents because your generation ruined he housing market with 100% mortgages and great interest rates???

Let's look at the facts before all the keyboard warriors get involved!

A slightly disgruntled estate agent who regularly bends over backwards and does not spend time with my family and friends because I'm too busy helping my clients....

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Tracy 7th September, 2015 @ 16:18


reading some of the old comments.... I think the dumbest estate agents are in Nottingham...

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Steve Merlin 7th September, 2015 @ 16:25


A conveyancer claiming an estate agent is self-serving?


I've heard it all now. Seriously. All.

That was brilliant. A conveyancer sitting on a high horse, really, that's quite unbelievable, but there he was, right up there.

Come on Simon, leave us your number, and I'll laugh at you down the phone. I beg you.

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Louise 12th September, 2015 @ 12:58

Reading this has actually made me quite sad - yes, there are so many agents out there that fit into this category, but for those who do things legally, are qualified and don't have the regular branded Mini's or Fiat 500's (we completely went outside the box for our branded vehicle), it's actually quite depressing - and not because everything that's been written isn't true (about some of the industry), it's more because they are STILL there and people are STILL paying them to continue having a foothold in the market place.

At the end of the day, if you're using an agent to find you tenants, or to manage your property and you are not happy with them, MOVE AGENCY! It only takes a couple of phone calls!

The problem is, and I'm sure there are plenty of landlords on here that do this, that people STILL employ the terrible agents! If no one did, they wouldn't be there or they'd be losing out to their much better competitors and be forced to change their business model.

It's actually very simple - don't go for the cheapest fee, check who's qualified in the office and always check their client satisfaction stats. Don't just assume that because they have a huge glass fronted office with 140 inch TVs means they're good at what they do - it means they can spend your fee on unnecessary things and might not have the level of client care you need from them as your agent.

When we opened our agency we vowed to be different, and we really are (I'm not just saying it)! We have been nominated, and are/were finalists for 2 awards in our first trading year with 100% satisfaction rate and 5 star reviews from all our clients that have left them - this is completely up to date. We're either qualified or studying to do the qualifications (ARLA and NAEA), keep up to date with the law and legislation, have a marketing team to make sure all property is marketed in the very best light and are very picky with those who we look to employ.

Anyway, enough of me rambling!

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Iain 19th September, 2015 @ 14:27

Oh, reading this has really brightened up my day :) especially @Simon Merlin, who being a solicitor ( may have a law degree, many conveyancers don't) is actually the cause of most of the hate which gets aimed at estate agents - solicitors f**k up the sale through their incompetence, take too long, go on holiday, don't know what they're doing, insist on never phoning the other side but sending a f***ing letter!

But, at the end of the day the agents get blamed!

As to valuing houses - the vendor tells us what they want to sell for, we advise them on what we think is realistic - they tell us what they need to achieve to make a move work - our job is to try and achieve that - anyone who thinks that a property is on the market for what an agent values it at is an idiot...

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Nathalie 26th September, 2015 @ 08:12

Wow! The article has me giggling with a quiet morbid fascination. I feel as though someone went into my head and typed up 90% of what are my personal thoughts. Unfortunately, mortgage advisors are way worse. As visitor that will be in this country for 3-4 years....I have never come across such incompetence by mortgage advisors ever. One even made off with 275 GBP of my money only to left me with absolutely no mortgage when I finally found a house.

It's sad to see that if this article and the comments are true about estate agents in this country, makes things just really sad. In the U.S., they have to go through courses and then pass a board to be able to be an agent. Then you have specific buyer's and seller's agents. The buyer's agent does the real work in my opinion. My realtor/estate agent showed me 107 houses (bungalows) over a 2 month period. She was the most awesome agent there was. I get lost real easily. So I would meet her at a specific location and she would drive me around to see about 4-5 houses per visit. She would send me a list of properties, and I would pick out the ones I wanted to see. One of the first houses I saw with a pool, I was ready to make my offer. She asked me if I was going to take care of the pool. I told her no. She told me, to forget about buying the property, as she owns a house with a pool, and that is at least 20-30% of the property value. And if I don't take care of it (which she explained all the work that goes into it), then I am just wasting my money. She further told me, if I want a pool so bad, I am invited to come to her house to use her pool. There was another house that she showed me, that I fell in love with the garden bathtub. It was made of marble....it has been the best bathtub that I have ever seen. I was in love. I was ready to put my offer in. She told me, you are NOT buying this house. It has been broken into twice, and as you are a single woman living by yourself, I would not want to be watching it on the news that you have been a victim. ONE HUNDRED AND SEVEN houses later....and me being a freaking incompetent prima donna.... that estate agent bless her soul was a freaking angel here on planet Earth to save me from my idiocity at the age of 28. I got a totally gorgeous house (which I almost lost because I was playing hard ball....this wonderful angel that saw me through 107 houses over 2 months of me waling and moaning.....then further put up with my rubbish attitude when the negotiations weren't going quickly enough....I told her to shove it and that I was done with her....all this and she didn't even force me to sign a contract- which is typical of the realtors/estate agents until I sign the damn contract to buy.....no one would put up with the rubbish I put that lady through). When it was said and done, she only made 3% on a house I bought for US$112,000 (which the seller paid). That small amount of money was not worth all the hell she went through with me. I lost my keys or got locked a few times...and she is the first person I called to come jimmy the lock and get me into my house. When my mom came o visit me 6 months post me buying the house, she treated both my mom and I to lunch. We remained friends for 7 years after I bought my house until she moved out of the state. So, coming here to England....my battle has been with mortgage advisors....because no use looking at properties if I am not able to buy them. I have looked at a few properties. And I have to say...William H. B estate agent where I am....is absolutely the worst piece of rubbish there is. After owning my own home (which is now being rented/letted in the U.S) for 8 years prior to moving (now own it 9 years) which is a mansion 1700 sq ft(for US$112,000 or almost 73,000 GBP) and coming to the tiny little bungalows over here for 140,000 GBP for under 600 sq ft (my master bedroom in Texas would fit the whole house here in England) it is just a shock that I am dumping 1300 GBP on rent and in a sleepy little town because I am a visitor and can't get a freaking mortgage when my annual salary is 52,000 GBP. Anyway...I guess my ramble does not even support this article....Because, apart from one dirty scoundrel estate agent, I had one really motivated one (that was phenomenal)....and I met a few others that didn't seem to care either way. The one rotten one was a massive slap in the face after knowing what great service I got from my awesome one that showed me 107 houses and actually cared about me and the house I got more than the commission she was making. And that is a fact.

Hmm, the solicitors I got seem to be worth their grain....in that the no good estate agent sat on her fanny and did nothing when I was trying to move in by the end of November last year in the property that the seller/vendor agreed to sell me. Needless to say, 10 days later and I heard nothing from that little turd. I had never had the pleasure of meeting her...because she was too good to show up to the appointments to show me the property. The solicitor (conveyor) was the one who I asked what was going on. He found out that the vendor did not plan to move out before CHRISTMAS! So I walked!

Write an article on mortgage advisors and I will tel you how worthless they are. Stupid punks.

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Nick 28th September, 2015 @ 15:08

I'm still trying to work out how Stacey and her website make any money. It doesn't mention costs of any sort anywhere. Fair enough there may be a slight markup for arranging EPC's etc, but unless the buyer is paying by Tender I'm unsure?

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HousingCrisisUK 1st October, 2015 @ 16:57

I've met many EA's over the years, mainly in London, and they're not really a bad bunch - some are unscrupulous, but they're only trying to make a living.
However there are some serious problems with housing in the UK -
1. 75% of MP's are private landlords, so there is not a single chance in the BTL market being reformed. Every time someone who already owns a house buys another one they don't actually need, they've just taken one away that a FTB could have bought. This is simple economics and why housing generally is in total crisis in the UK. People buying extra houses for themselves, for profit reasons, pushes prices up and restricts supply permanently.
2. We need a government that cares about all people, not just people that vote for them. Sounds naive, but until this happens we will get what we deserve - an Emperors New Clothes property market, no new council houses/ "build to rent" schemes and a whole generation of people who will never own and/or are being ripped off by Estate Agents/ Buy to Let landlords.
3. There needs to be firm Rent Controls, especially in London. Don't believe me? Do the maths, in 4 or 5 years time a 3 bed house will be 2.2K pcm to rent and that is totally unsustainable. Not to mention immoral. And that is why Estate Agents have such a bad reputation, because they bury their head in the sand about the direct and indirect human misery their commission chasing has caused for years. Local Housing Allowance + 20% would be a reasonable level. It should also be illegal for agents/ landlords to to advertise "no DSS". That's just discrimination and needs to be stopped.
4. The taxation system needs reforming, to maximise CGT for the the country (not minimise it for payors) and ringfence this money for build to rent schemes like in Germany. It should be linked to your income tax rate, like it used to be, with no exemption band.
5. The whole banking system and Estate Agency sector needs radical reform. Don't believe me? These two intertwined systems, that serve only rich people at the expense of the poor, have been responsible for bringing this country to a crisis point. If you voted Tory at the last 2 elections then you too are responsible for the pain so many other people (i.e. not you or your family, but still other human beings) suffer while you count your money and houses. The country can't take another recession/ housing crash, but they are inevitable and reform will then be critical...

I leave you with an apology for going on so long, am passionate about this stuff as I work for a homelessness charity, but also with a quick story which sums it all up for me. Recently I spoke to an agent, who once I told them I wasn't interested in a property I'd viewed really let their guard down and spoke "off the record". He said he was looking for property himself and the cheapest in his area were studio flats in Cricklewood going for £400K. When I asked what he thought they REALLY should be on the market for, he said £150K. This was the exact figure I had in mind too, and there you have the problem in a nutshell. Property is 50% overvalued, a few people are doing really well out of this fact and don't care about anyone else, and until significant reform along some of the lines above happens, then we do have a huge housing crisis. Estate Agents would improve the perception of them as an industry if they admitted and understood their integral role in this crisis and the amount of pain they cause ordinary people...

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steve 9th October, 2015 @ 13:30

rentstar in brisbane, They don't care what their tenants do to the property or the neighbours. Avoid them if you have a property as they are failing to protect their owners by failing to act

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Brian 20th October, 2015 @ 14:10

UK needs to wake up

In Canada you have to take a two year course to become an agent and pass a difficult exam that has less than 37% pass rate on the first go around.

Then an agent must work for two years under license agent before obtaining one's license from the central license agency. In short it is highly regulated.

All rental or sales contracts are standardize and it illegal for any agent to use any contract expect what has been all ready approved.

This is why most properties in Canada are sold without lawyers, as non are needed as the industry is high regulated.

Amendments are allowed but first must be approved by the central agency law firm that controls all agents, who all agents must get a license from
in order to represent one as an agent. And to continue to be an agent, an agent has to take approved courses on an on going bases and pass them or their license is taken away until such time they can pass upgrading courses. It is taken serious because it the largest expenditure for most people, buying a house or renting.

In contrast in the UK (where the single biggest expenditure for most people is the purchase of a home, or the single biggest expenditure per month is rent)anyone with a heart beat can be an agent. It gets worse on the office of fair trading website it explains how person in the UK can become an agent
if they have been convicted of crime. No wonders people are using agents less and less in the UK. If I was an agent in the UK I would have system changed. This why 9/10 people in Britain hate agents, because it basically unregulated. Why

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propertywizzard 22nd October, 2015 @ 11:44

The fact is the Government are not willing to implement licencing, I spoke with both Grant Shapp the housing minister at the time HIPS was abandoned and Eric Pickles I asked them why they did not licence the industry, well after 3 minutes of politician waffle I was non the wiser, they had no good reason and it should have been done at the same time as EPC's became law, in the meantime if you use an agent make sure they are members of the NFOPP ARLA NAEA, that they also have deposits bonded and display a deposit recourse scheme, it wont guarantee 100% satisfaction, but neither will licencing, all very frustrating, made more so by our quirky Leasehold system which would exclude transactions being completed without the use of a lawyer as you suggest.

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Rosey 3rd November, 2015 @ 17:36


I have rented for 8 years now and I wholeheartedly agree with this article, you even nailed the wanker mobile.

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Nathalie 22nd November, 2015 @ 06:21

@Paul post from 19 Nov 15, I don't see your post on the thread above, but both your posts made it into my e-mail box, I am not certain if the moderator is unscrupulously removing posts that they don't agree with or not. My experiences with estate agent here as previously stated is very limited. There is one agent, the first one I met that work with Mr. W. H. Brown, and it is my opinion that after the 27 years that she supposedly have been doing her "job" as a estate agent that it's people like her (Leslie) that give your trade a bad rap. She was the laziest person I ever came across. Over a 3 week period, she "showed" me two houses....neither of which she of which she showed up to (never met the the woman...yet, she was going to be benefiting from a pay check and not showing up to a showing when she said she would). The second house I decided to buy and wanted to move in within a 30 day period 1 year and 1 month ago....needless to say, she wasted 2 weeks of my house searching time on a property where the people were not planning on moving out until after the New Years.....I wanted to move in before 25 Nov 14. After signing the agreement to purchase....I did not hear from her again...all my contacts via e-mail and phone went unanswered. My solicitor was the one that finally got me some answers. Now my experience in the U.S., worlds of difference! I had my "buyer's agent" because I was a buyer not a seller....and she was interested in my interest and made sure I wasn't buying something that was not suited for me. We looked at 107, yes that is right ONE HUNDRED and SEVEN houses within 2 months.....and she physically drove me to all those properties herself. The house was US$110,000.....and she only made 3% on that....which I as the buyer did not pay. The seller pays the seller's agent 3% and the buyer's agent's 3%. So your 6% for US estate agent aka realtor is not 100% accurate....it is accurate if you are the seller. If you are a buyer, you do not pay the agent's fee unless otherwise agreed upon.

Each state in the U.S. has a governing body/board that govern their realtors/estate agents. That is stated on the contract you sign. When I signed with that lazy wretch named Leslie, I never saw such a documentation that she is governed by all those so-called rules that you stated in your post. The mortgage advisors on the other hand did give me the paperwork under who the watchdogs were and what recourses I can take if I believe I was unscrupulously dealt with.

Paul, you yourself could be an excellent agent......and there is no doubt that there are other hard working estate agents out there...because I met a Jane from a completely different agency than the guy W. H. Brown and she was superb in showing me about 5 houses within a 2 weeks period, it would have been more....but I was weary of seeing too many houses that did not fit my criteria on paper first. No way was I going to look at 107 houses again. No estate agent here in England or even the U.S really could match the service I got from my realtor (Velia) in 2006, she deserve sainthood after dealing with me. God bless her soul.

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Nathalie 22nd November, 2015 @ 06:26

p.s: Let me just clarify now, ALL 107 houses I saw before I went to go look at them, ALL made the criteria on paper.....so yes, my realtor was only sending me houses that match the descriptions I was looking for.

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Nathalie 22nd November, 2015 @ 06:59

@Post #546 aka HousingCrisisUK, while I can see the sense in your post, the only problem I saw outright that was off is your 50% over-valued of housing....from the example you gave, the true worth of the house $150K to the $400K it is being sold for would make that 267% overpriced. I live in a little bitty town in suffolk county, and the cheapest you can get a 2 bedroom bungalow on average is about $150K. Some of these houses are under 600 sq ft, and before the housing bubble ballooned up and popped in 2008 ( a mere 7 years ago), these houses were on the market for about $40K-$60K maximum. What a difference the so-called unregulated price hike has done. The pop, that took place, barely corrected the over-inflated price. My house that I bought in Texas (U.S.) was 1700 sq ft and I paid U.S$110K (~70K GBP)in 2006. The houses in my neighborhood is still the same prices pre-the 2008 pop as it is the same now at 2015. Granted, there is always inflation in different neighborhood....but my neighborhood (a decent one, with well kept up homes, no violence that I am aware of, family oriented, over 40 years old.....I am the second owner of a house that was built in 1972)....the size of my Master bedroom, if I remember correctly is 440 sq ft....here in England, that is almost the size of the WHOLE house....and even though my house is my house is 3 times as big as the typical 2 bedroom room bungalow, my house is less than half the price. If I compare size to purchase value of my house in Texas to England, my house would be worth 450K GBP (not the 70K GBP) that I paid. That is a 643% inflation to the rate in Texas. Granted, there are houses in other parts of Texas that is a whole lot more expensive....and other parts of the U.S. like California that can be super expensive.....bottom line is, if I am comparing an area that is similar to where I bought my last home....then I gotta say...the inflation here is a freaking killer. I was all set on buying a house here....withdraw money from my retirement to do....but after jumping through all the wrong hoops because the mortgage advisors(92% are idiots)....out of 12 of them, I finally came across 1 that knew what he was talking about, unfortunately it was 1 year too late.....so now, the penalty I took against my retirement....and the interest lost from it not accruing anything sitting in a currents account losing value the more the GBP lose out against the US$....not to mention I am paying and additional 4% interest on the loan....not to mention I lost US$3,000 due to the loss in value when I first exchange....and now I am bitter on this whole country and their backward systems. So, ce la vie....I am going to take that retirement money and start traveling and enjoying life, forget the UK and their unscrupulous housing practice.

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george 22nd November, 2015 @ 11:29

Your experiences in UK housing market concurr exactamente with mine, so much so we will not deal AT ALL with certain estate agents/realtors, especially Messrs W.H.Brown.
The UK situation is so bad I've almost given up trying to buy a house, even though I have the hard cash to do so. Also, I'm sick of looking at dilapidated, damp, old and overpriced houses. I won't even consider anymore a house that's not at least interwar.
As I forecast some time ago, the zero inflation rate is still with us, in MHO will be with us for many years yet. Therefore, overpriced houses will not sell after a good while because of inflation as was in the past; there isn't any inflation now. Natalie, your US experience makes refreshing reading.
Look out for the attempted "dumping" of ex-rental houses and flats on the UK market. It's already started up here in the general Leeds area. The changes in tax allowance on loans to buy rental property, the laws now on landlords being responsible for their tenants (see the BBC1 tv morning show on this), the enforcement by local authorities of these laws that rental houses be fit and safe to live in, the huge percentage of private tenants being in arrears of over 8 weeks, all are convincing many private landlords to try and get out of this market altogether. Some of these houses are being sold from under the feet of current tenants; when viewing, you could cut the atmosphere with a knife if the tenant is there. Now, I WILL NOT EVEN CONSIDER AN EX-RENTAL HOUSE AT ALL. Apart from anything else, the areas are often "benefit street" districts, and I don't want to live in such a place. See the tv shows in UK recently on this very problem.

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Nathalie 22nd November, 2015 @ 12:18

I refused to look at any other Mr. W. H. Brown properties regardless of whether they fit all the criteria I am looking for on paper, that Leslie woman has left a very disgusting taste and feels in my outlook to the point where I cut out any and all properties under that entire company's listing. I finally decided to throw the towel in 3 weeks ago. And just purchase a nice vacation for a 4 day weekend for myself in Italy....loan 3,000 GBP to an acquaintance business that is about to close down...and decide to stay in my over-inflated furnished lodging 1,300 GBP for a two bedroom place. I am a visiting U.S force, if as a military member, I don't get any preferential treatment....seeing as the U.S military has been in this country assisting over 80+ years (the most they will give is some business allowing us to use our VAT discount....where we as military members have to jump through a few hoops to get it).....bottom line, I will stay the remaining 3+ years in an over-inflated temporary lodging permanently (till I leave, and I have no remorse tat I could live in a much bigger place for 900 GBP....the military pays for it...so I will let them.....they sure didn't do me any favor for not paving the way for me to purchase....so why save them a few bucks extra?).

Traveling, here I come......no more living like a pauper trying to build up beyond the 10% deposit I had in hopes of getting a mortgage no one wants to lend to an American.....apparently, my money is not good enough.

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David Votta 4th December, 2015 @ 07:54

I never take these blogs seriously and neither should anyone else. It's typical of the age we are in where an outspoken individual decides they want to vent their thoughts to create a mass debate (excuse the pun) it would be like me saying all solicitors are money grabbing time wasters because I have never been impressed by one I've dealt with. Or all Muslims are terrorists. The reality of these kind of blogs are it's a generalised one-sided statement. Some of it is accurate like you do not have to be qualified but the rest is just perception and a very poor one at that. I for one am a member of the Association of residential letting agents which does require a qualification also ongoing personal development. Therefore I need to know the law in order to be as good as I am in order to out do everyone of my competition and I'm yet to meet at my agent that understands the law as intimately as I do or gives as good service. feel free to look up on the trust pilot website site for David Votta at Ward And Partners. Customer reviews speak volumes. And we are running a nine point five out of ten rating. Unfortunately the author of this blog doesn't understand that the industry that we operate in is full of monkeys with regards to landlords, buyers and sellers. You don't have to be smart to own a property let's face it, however every vendor/landlord believes they have the best property in the world even though the one three Doors Down sold for for less than what they are asking and is in a far better condition. Agents have a business to run so in order to run the business effectively sometimes we have to keep our mouth shut take on properties we don't want to at the prices we don't want to and sell or let them otherwise we cannot run a business. The general public are wise enough to understand what kind of properties they want and what they don't want as well as what they are willing to pay and the beauty of Internet searches is that you can look up the property before booking the viewing or wasting everyone's time. yes the photos do look lovely with the professional agents however surely everybody knows the professional photography is there to make things look better and enhance them and give a good service to the person you are working for??? I could go on and on and on and pick holes in this blog and argue the points raised however I'm going go open up my branch and make someone else's day because that's how I roll!!! Feel free to pop down to my office if you'd like to talk about my qualifications and legislation dating back to section 18 of the distress for rent at 1737 right up to the deregulation act of 2015 and I'll show you how I am able to contradict everyone of your points. Ramsgate branch.

My summary of your blog is similar to that of everyone who goes on Facebook and has an opinion about the current economic climate and political views, everyone thinks they are righteous and knowledgeable

A little bit of knowledge is dangerous...

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Simon Merlin 4th December, 2015 @ 14:57

............and most estate agents I have come across don't even have 'a little bit of knowledge' :-)

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Billy Haynes 3rd February, 2016 @ 17:18

Estate Agents Uncut...


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Sam 17th March, 2016 @ 16:47

This web blog is funny, I agree estate agents are idiots... :)
even in Spain... !!

but if there any website out there advising on how to annoy estate agents!

I know one trick, don't register when you call estate agent to inquiry, they are obliged to give out info on the property without the need to register your full details..

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Joe 11th April, 2016 @ 11:40

The Ombudsman service is as bad though! they are in bed with the estate agents, most useless services... how come no one mention it..


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Rich 11th April, 2016 @ 12:30

The ombudsman is rubbish but not in bed with agents. They take forever to make a decision which also looks bad on agents. There should be an Ombudsman for Ombudsman!

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David Votta 11th April, 2016 @ 16:51


Yes they probably are obliged to give you the information but what's the point if you don't register? you are not going to get the property your just wasting yours and everyone else's time??? Bit like this blog I suppose....

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Joe 12th April, 2016 @ 11:56

Majority of case workers at the Ombudsman were estate agents, they will always favour the agent, they never look at any case from legal prospective.. that is a scam to start with. Also takes 6 - 9 months average


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David Votta 12th April, 2016 @ 21:44

In my experience they always look at the facts and what's reasonable (in my experience anyway) I had a case with a woman who escalated to the ombudsman, she also has a Twitter page for her dog. Needless to say we failed to meet her expectation on the complaint (which wasn't a complaint just her failure to understand)

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Itmakessense 19th April, 2016 @ 14:51

Almost all Estate Agents are liars and greedy little gits whipping everyone into a frenzy to rush through the next commission. I thought everyone knew that? Brighton is one of the worst places for lying agents and the solicitors that pay clients money to the agents are just as bad. We now have agents who will refuse to show you a house unless you use the solicitors they are in cahoots with. Hey, Guess what, the solicitors (if they are qualified) they use are usually really poor at what they do. Always use your preferred solicitor and never be bullied by an agent or a new build developer either. The only reason for a new build developer to fear you using your preferred solicitor is if they have something they don't want you to find out. If selling, do you really want to put your property on the market with an agent that will refuse to sell it to someone just because they won't use their lawyer, look how much they are charging you anyway. Like I siad, greedy little scum bags. Soon, hopefully high street agents will be a thing of the past, can't come soon enough!

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Joe 5th May, 2016 @ 20:27

I totally agree with the person "It make sense", and think almost all estate agents are lairs, is nationwide and not only Brighton.

A friend of mine who left office maintenance work to start as a estate agent, she said it was a mistake, they were actually training her to hide the truth! which is basically lay.

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Eli 13th May, 2016 @ 12:21

All ( and really mean it all) estate agents are rubbish and stupid.

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jimbo 26th May, 2016 @ 14:57

Been having the most ludicrous exchange with Burns & Webber, the estate agents who sold us our house 3 years ago. Had at least 4 sales calls from them, even though we're on the telephone preference list, and the last time, when i asked to stop being called she said, "oh it's just a courtesy call". When i said politely, "well no it isn't is it, it's a sales call" she hung up.
Then the next day i got this email;

"I have been made aware of a telephone call you have just had from my colleague during which you were unnecessarily rude.
As a company we do not tolerate this and I will ensure that you are now removed from our database, as you do not wish to be called again anyway."

Had lots of emails back and forth with the MD and though he apologises for the calls and for making me angry about this email, he won't accept that i wasn't rude...i didn't swear, as i had every right to do, and they either don't record their calls or just refuse to check it. Unjust, insulting and patronising!

Here's what being rude is actually like: you're a bunch f**cking lying moronic tw*ts.

Urban dictionary definition of courtesy call...
"A sugarcoated term used by telemarketers which really means sales call. One of the most deceitful and misleading phrases ever since there is nothing courteous about it".

..and this is ignoring the ridiculous idea that i might have not considered selling my house but, thanks to the "courtesy" call, i might now think it's a great idea.

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David Votta 27th May, 2016 @ 21:09


At least you Now know never to use burns and Webber again what a terrible attitude they have. They need to read a bit of dale Carnegie 😂

May I ask what is the defining decision when you guys and girls choose your agents? I often meet clients that make their choice of agents due to the fee. they pay a low fee and wonder why they get a terrible service.... Vicious cycle.

Can i ask all of you to please contact me when you decide to sell or let again because I love it when My customers receive a great service and shares that experience with others.

Then we can create a new blog


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linda 14th June, 2016 @ 18:12

I own a park home no mortgage age to buy 50 been on sale 8 months 1 person through my agents but not 50 until jan 2017 her agent same one as me told her to wait they told me its easier to sell her house rather than mine so reduced mine still no sale suggested she sold and rented or sell at put it in her mums name still waiting I can sell it on the pitch or an ad in my window this is the third agent I have had my worry is this crap period of 4 weeks to sell its past that you will pay if the agent had talks with or another agent none of these apply to me doses this liability last for 6 months and up to 2 years so if I took it off the market and did not sell then in jan sold it to her am I still liable totally fed up with the whole thing linda

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Jas. 29th June, 2016 @ 15:31


Properties are going down, I see most properties in a "Good" areas of London have been reduced in order to get sold...

don't be fooled by these Idiots estate agents ...

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David Votta 29th June, 2016 @ 20:19

Looks like Some need to chose a better quality of agent, let me guess called 6 out and picked one around the middle or one that had good board presence or one that had an attractive fee? If one is to be fooled by an idiot estate agent then one needs to chose wisely in future.

Look up ward and partners on trustpilot with an average rating of 9.7 out of 10.

That's how you make people happy people that care about people.


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No One 5th August, 2016 @ 06:57

Worse than selling estate agents are the management agent, they manage your money than building, disgrace

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Mohammed 12th August, 2016 @ 09:26

Hello, I agree with Jas. property start dropping down, as much as 10% possibly more ..


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Dec 25th September, 2016 @ 21:45

Nice to see such narrow minded people label estate agents.

Working in a desirable part of the U.K. and charging 1 - 1.25% commission of house sales (as a rough figure averaging £750k) I find it hard agreeing with the above, and find it embarrassing on your part - having the courage to write such a strong article when you clearly have no idea of how this trade works.

I'm laughing at myself for even commenting on this post, but guess what, you keep that thought process in mind when you try to buy your next house, I can assure you if you approach the agents the wrong way, you'll be 'pushing an elephant up the stairs' - I do hope you can use that in your article.

You've made my day. I might write an article in your line of work... Then again, I'm not naive enough to write my opinion on a trade I know nothing about... Get facts, statistics, and a BASIC understanding of how we operate (and how we are governed / monitored) before writing such garbage.

Oh, we're all people too, I take on board your comments and hatred for estate agents, I.e myself and my colleagues, thanks for that.


A regular 'Money grabbing, idiot, self centred estate agent'

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Duncan Pattinson 9th October, 2016 @ 12:45

If you do visit an Estate Agent, do they take the time to discuss what it costs to move house?
Sounds simple but in our experience this isn't discussed. The obvious happens. Many Homebuyers start to want to buy a home and then realise what it costs. It pays to cost out a moving house checklist so that you can budget for your move. Get fixed fee quotes and sit down with your sales agent to understand the moving house process. You should be able to save and convey your move quickly.

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George 8th December, 2016 @ 12:13

Im guessing the person that made this page had an awful experience. It's not 3% either, its more like 1%-1.25%. I'f your not happy with the fees your being charged, why dont you try Purple Bricks haha and see how much you like them in comparison to your regular ''honest''agent.

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Pardusco 12th December, 2016 @ 23:37

Brown & Merry is the worst agency I ever seen. When a tenant calls them for any help they either don't answer or redirect to the landlord. They also have no problem in breaking the law or being disrespectful and very rude. For sure any other agency is better than they are. They are very expensive for the bad service they provide and the bad image they can project on the landlord

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Rosemary Young 19th December, 2016 @ 15:15

I have just stumbled across this diatribe. It is somewhat out of date, since 2007 a plethora of legislation has come in to prevent unscrupulous practices.

Trying to debase a 'profession' by character assassinations indicates that the 'author' is rather weak and pathetic (not nice is it Mr Author).

I would go through all the points and counter them but clearly it is a rant that I have already give more time to than it deserves.

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The Landlord 19th December, 2016 @ 15:35

@Rosemary Young
Doesn't really bother me either way; I know there are good and bad in every profession. A large portion of landlords are equally as unscrupulous as the agents I refer to in this blog post, so I would never be self-righteous enough to step in the way when someone highlights a few underhand tactics favoured by many landlords, which we all know is happening. I focus my energy on being one of the good ones.

So new legislations/laws have stopped all of the above from happening? Alright. Must be nice where you live.

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Joe 9th January, 2017 @ 17:45

I hate estate agents, they are all about bullshit...

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Matt 10th January, 2017 @ 03:11

All agents are about bullshit eh....

Wonder if u stereotype muslims, fat people or disabled people as well...

Yes there are morons working in the industry, but NOT ALL are pricks. I'm an agent for 11 years and thrive on giving best advice and helping clients in one of the biggest processes they'll ever go through.

This thread just shows how ignorant and narrow minded people can be. Sad state of affairs.

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joe 11th January, 2017 @ 11:50

@ Matt

no we don't hate Muslims or Jewish or fat people, but we hate people with fat wallets made their money out of bullshitting. You must be one of the " Estate angels" giving advise for 11 years !! thank you

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Rich 11th January, 2017 @ 12:17

Ha Joe.
Exactly the same reason Hitler used to get people to hate the Jews for taking all the money .
How does it feel to be so easily led by propaganda and cheap news. People don't hate estate agents in real life..its a media 80's thing.

Also letting agents and estate agents should be treated as separate things.

Foxtons hardly ever get hateful sellers, buyers or landlords..its always crazy tenants who go ape shit about a light bulb not being fixed.

but hey - you keep generalizing..its very popular - ist. you mug

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Tony 13th February, 2017 @ 16:26

1)Yes, any old "mentally challenge turd" can work as an estate agent which is why any reputable agent will be registered with NAEA for sales or ARLA for lettings so consumers do have recourse.
2) Read the above and from a sales perspective all parties are covered by the Property Misdescription Act which covers what is written, said verbally or photographed on all properties. Bear in mind Trading Standards Office can audit any of us all the time.
3)Does every agent have brand cars? Even the ones that do is there anything wrong with advertising and being proud of who you work for?
4) Totally buyer biased, if you were selling would you expect your estate agent to show how popular your property is or just hope for the best.
5)Irrelevant what the estate agent thinks, is anyone in their right mind going to buy a property that doesn't suit them? If we are all "mentally challenged turds" why would you seek our opinion?
6)A total contradiction, either we get buyers to overpay or get vendors to undersell, we can't do both!
7)What does a typical blogger look like then? I guessing a speccy twat with no girlfriend sitting around in his or her pants.
8)If you understand why someone is looking for a property there becomes a purpose for showing them, the more viewings you have with a property the more likely they are to offer, the more likely a property is to sell.
9)Welcome to ANY sales job.
10) As above and as a "reputable blogger" why would you bring acts of racism that have been around for hundreds of years into one single sales industry?
11) 100% agree. It is illegal but some of the less desirable agents will do it.
12) Based on an agent just finding someone who wants to buy a property what if we actually attend viewings, what if we actually ask for proof of funding, what about the viewings we attend that don't show up and then dealing with solicitors for at least a couple of months after?
13)As a professional I know not just the local schools but the OFSTED reports for each of them, bus routes, train services, local amenities, etc. It's what stands me out from the scum you describe rather than all you determine us all to be.
14) When you bear in mind that even if a property sells straight away we have around 4-5 months work before we get paid, break that down to an hourly rate and we get less than minimum wage although often we do a lot more than you give us credit for.
15)There is a LEGAL duty to put ALL offers forward within 48 hours of receipt under the Estate Agents Act.

Maybe if there was an act that prevented "mentally challenged turds" like you posting things like this from which many, professional, reputable people choose to earn their living, what is predominantly a customer serviced based industry in which you can't get someone to pay huge sums of money for something they don't want or need we would be held in slightly higher esteem. I totally get that the type of agent you describe exists but to tar us all with the same brush is just insulting. As a father of three who all go to Catholic school to judge me and my industry based on shallow, incorrect basis is just wrong. What exactly gives you the right to be so disparaging about so many people who help many people realise their dreams? Jesus loves us but just thinks you are a ****.

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rich 13th February, 2017 @ 21:18

Well said. I wish the govt. would just say,,look buyers, the estate agents work for the vendor,,if you want a 'magic' experience pay for a buying agent..which don't exist in most of the country because its only 0.0001 idiots who feel the need to write this cr+p online anyway.

An agent lost his 2 year old daughter to cancer a few days ago.

what does that make him??? i d say human.

Stop being so polulist, ignorant and small minded....fool

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Matt 13th February, 2017 @ 22:16

It's easy to make an agent a scapegoat, especially when a sale goes wrong. Yet with the modern technology agents are still as prominent as ever. We're a needed profession and always will be.

Only the experienced buyer or seller will appreciate what an estate agent does for their commission, when you actually break down what the person who sells the property earns for what can be months upon months of work
Often baffles people. Most ignorant sellers or buyers assume the total fee a seller pay goes direct to the negotiator. Total ignorance.

In any form of profession there's good and bad, but you always hear the bad stories and never the good. You don't hear people bemoaning estate agent firms who regularly raise hundreds of thousands for charities, or at Christmas going to old people's homes with hampers and goods to help them at a time of year when they are alone and or vinrelble.

I could go on, but it doesn't make good press.

One thing I will say is that I do believe the industry to be more regulated and people
Have to sit exams prior to being able to work within the profession, that I personally believe would see the general public respect estate agents more.


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