The Worst Tenant Application EVER

Bad Tenants

The other day I think I received, what I believe to be, the worst tenant application, EVER. Why? Because this is how she introduced herself to me…

hi i was interested in the house you want to rent out, thing is i need to know if you accept dss. iv been living with my mum since December 27th with my two young daughters because there dad chucked us out so need to get them in a home asap please reply thanx [insert name]

Fucking unbelievable, yet extremely amusing, right? Any sane landlord wouldn’t even give this girl a chance. Some might say it’s unfair and that i’m discriminating, but I say “good business sense”.

The thing about finding good tenants is that it’s all about minimizing odds and calculating the odds. For example, the odds of getting less trouble off an employed professional worker compared to a single mother on benefits are extremely high. Of course, that won’t always be the case, but it’s safer to stick with the better odds. More explained over at The Best And Worst Tenants post.

Whilst the applicant sounds like a nice girl, and while I can honestly somewhat sympathise with her situation, the fact still remains that her situation is far from desirable for a landlord (even a desperate one that’s about to get repossessed).

If she had half a brain, she wouldn’t have fed me the latest gossip, so I was aware of her terrible situation, at least that way I would have given her a chance. What she did was on the same par as me applying for a job with the cover letter saying

My last boss fired me, so I’ve been working as a pimp ever since. But I want a proper job, so I thought I would apply.

Also, as part of my package, i’d like a 5min break every 45mins so I can ejaculate in the toilets.

Hardly appealing, right?

In any case, I don’t deal with DSS tenants anymore. I’ve had enough trouble from them in the past. Before anyone jumps down my throat, I have a problem with the system- it’s fucking ridiculous- and not the individuals claiming benefits. I’ve already ranted and raved about why I dislike DSS tenants over at DSS Tenants And The Council.

Here’s a more precise list of reasons why I refused her application:

  • I don’t deal with DSS tenants, as explained
  • She’ll most likely have to pay a shortfall each month. I wouldn’t trust her to pay, especially since she has a few mouths to feed
  • She’s an unemployed single mother with 2 kids
  • Her partner left her. There must be something wrong with her, right?
  • If her partner decides to make a surprise return, there could be trouble i.e broken walls/windows
  • I’m sure I could find someone with better credentials.

Anyways, if you’re looking for a place to rent, think hard about how you sell yourself to the Landlord. In a booming rental market, Landlords can afford to be picky.

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7 Comments- Join The Conversation...

Guest Avatar
laura knight 11th August, 2008 @ 06:50

lol hah what was that girl thinking? I wouldn't have given her a chance either. That sounds like trouble from the word go

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Guest Avatar
The Single Mother 14th August, 2008 @ 09:20

Whilst I understand your comments and difficulties with DSS, I would like to stick up for single mothers with two children who claim benefits. I was happily married with two beautiful children. My husband went off with someone else (nothing wrong with me?). I had previously had an exceptionally good career with good salary but was at home looking after the children. When he left I had no choice but to turn to the government for help. They help fully now and until the children are in full time school it is not financially viable to work (the childrens dad leaving and then their mother disappears for hours on end - unsettling?) This is awful. I grew up well had a private education have never claimed benefits before in my life!!!! Once the children go to school I will get back to work and will be ok again!!! But I am nice, clean, have good manners and do not cause any problems! It has been hard to come to terms with how I ended up like this because of the stigma. Thanks for listening! Hey to all the single moms that had no choice and HATE their situations!!! xx

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The Landlord Avatar
The Landlord 14th August, 2008 @ 11:07

Hey Single Mother,

I completely understand your situation and do sympathise. I've experienced both good and bad times with DSS tenants, just as I’ve had good and bad experiences with fully employed working professionals.

I have no problem with DSS tenants as individuals. I just really don't like the way the government handles the system.

Anyways, this article wasn't intended to make DSS tenants look bad. It was merely demonstrating how not to apply for tenancy. There's no need to drag personal circumstances into the applications.

I hope things work out for you. Good luck.

Kind regards.

3
Guest Avatar
The Single Mother 14th August, 2008 @ 11:13

Hey

Sorry I didn't want to sound all PC!! I totally understand I would stay well clear of DSS from a business prospective!! The system is a nightmare and alot of the tenants do unfortunately ruin it for the few that are cool!! Like me - lol. I dunno I just felt better for airing it!!!

Anyway, enjoyed reading your site! Giving me inspiration to go into property instead of conventional route again!!! Life is about living and taking risks!!!

Thanks

The Cool Single Mother!! :)

4
The Landlord Avatar
The Landlord 14th August, 2008 @ 13:30

Ha, I didn't think you were coming off as all PC, don't worry. I completely appreciated and understood everything you said.

Yeah, life is def about taking risks. You should buy 10 houses and get snowed under in debt :)

Out of curiosity, what was your previous profession?

"Cool single mother"...hmmm...I've seen your name and number in phoneboxes all over the UK. Been tempted to call many times hah

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Guest Avatar
The Single Mother 14th August, 2008 @ 14:25

Errr must have been another 'cool single mother'!! I worked in the Criminal Justice System! Anyway thanks for listening good luck with your venture!

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Guest Avatar
Andy 2nd August, 2013 @ 11:18

"My last boss fired me, so I’ve been working as a pimp ever since. But I want a proper job, so I thought I would apply. Also, as part of my package, i’d like a 5min break every 45mins so I can ejaculate in the toilets."

When can you start?

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